Friday, April 21, 2006

Rule 18 Protest Hearing

OK - let's get this over with quickly.
They made me protest chairman - God knows why.
Who's involved in this protest?



I'm protesting him.



And I'm protesting him.



OK, what happened? You go first.



I was inside the two boatlength circle and he didn't have an overlap but he rammed his nose in anyway and hit me and the buoy.



No. No. No. You were behind two other boats so you were definitely outside the circle when I entered it and I had an overlap and you didn't give me room.



(Sigh)



I shouted at you, "No room."



And I shouted at you, "Buoy room."



So what?



So I was in the right, the onus was on you.




Onus schmonus. No such thing.



Is too.



Is not.



(Sigh)
Does either of you have a witness?



Yes.




Who's your witness?



Hu's my witness.



And Yoo is my witness.



I can't be your witness.




Well who's your witness?




Hu's my witness.




I'm getting confused.
I don't know who's who.





Hu's my witness.




Look, this is too confusing.
You both look the same - are you brothers?
I keep forgetting what you said.
Go and find some real pictures of yourselves.





Is this OK?




That's Robin Gibb.




No it's not, this is me.
People say I look like Robin.




And this is me.





He's dead.





See - I told you that you'd lose the protest.






No - I mean that's Maurice Gibb, he died in 2003.





Can we get on with this hearing please?
The bar's been open 10 minutes.





OK. Who's your witness?





Hu had to leave.
He had a meeting in Washington.






Yoo had to leave too.






No I didn't.





This is hopeless.





Hey bro, I'm getting thirsty.
Do you want a beer?





Sure do.
How about we forget about the protest and go to the bar?





Sounds like a plan, bro.
I can't stand that dude with the hat.
Let's do it.


Thanks to Captain Nemesis, a frequent contributor to the forums at The Captain Humphrey's Project, for taking time out from sailing an 8 ft. boat around the world to chair the protest committee.

9 comments:

Cardinal Martini said...

Tillerman, is that you in the hat?

Tillerman said...

No - that's Captain Nemesis from the forums at captainhumphreys.com. I told you, I'm Robin Gibbs missing identical twin.

Captain Nemesis said...

ArrrrH Harr! very funny. Thanks, Matey!

skint writer said...

nice one :)

OG said...

that was bloody awesome mate!
it's sunday morning here 7:51am to be precice and in about 30 minutes i will have 40 students here (sailing school) between the ages of 7 and 13 who all want to learn how to sail - i needed something to make me smile, giggle, and even laugh out loud and this is icying on the cake! well done tillerman, you're a funny guy - any chance you would want to write some stuff for LSD?????????

bonnie said...

I can't stop giggling when I read this.

Tammy said...

LOL, very funny!

Harley said...

Who is this Captain Nemesis guy?

Zen said...

smashing!

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