Tuesday, November 16, 2010
According to the BBC my native country England is under attack from an invasion of killer shrimp. The evil creature, officially known as Dikerogammarus Villosus, is described by the Environment Agency as being 'particularly vicious and destructive'. Apparently the nasty little buggers bite and shred their victims to death but often leave them uneaten.
The alien invader hordes were recently spotted in Grafham Water, a popular sailing lake in eastern England, but this did not deter 248 courageous Laser sailors from showing up last weekend at Grafham for the Laser Inland Championships. For these intrepid souls, racing in a Laser regatta is even worth the risk of being bitten and shredded to death.
So what is to be done? How can Britain fight back against the alien invaders? Where is a latter day Churchill to inspire the country to action with a speech vowing, "We shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender"?
That David Cameron bloke who is now Prime Minister seems a pleasant enough chap but I don't think he has the temperament to lead the nation against the onslaught of Dikerogammarus Villosus.
But, if it's any help Mr. Cameron, I did find this recipe online for Killer Shrimp Soup.