Sunday, February 05, 2012

LiveBlogging the SuperbOwl

10:12 pm - Eli won a Chevy! Just like my daughter-in-law. He must be quite good.

10:08 pm - "This was one of the greatest football games ever seen." Really? I did like Mr. Quiggly though.

10:05 pm - Some old dude is carrying a shiny pointy ball that is apparently named after a rest area on the NJ Turnpike.

9:53 pm - Incomplete - whatever that means. Oh, apparently the game is over. East Rutherford has won. They don't seem to be talking about Tom Brady any more.

9:51 pm - Was that what they call a Hail Mary?

9:49 pm - Fourth and forever here, the guy says. I'm lost.

9:44 pm - He went into the endzone for the touchdown he didn't want??? Something to do with the clock??? And preserving a timeout??? Wheels within wheels. I though this was rugby and it's more like 4D tic-tac-toe.

9:40pm - Whoah I think I dozed off for half an hour or so. This game is sooooooooo thrilling.

8:54 pm - Tom Brady is sitting on a bench having a rest and the commentators are talking about what he is doing with his left arm. Geeze. Isn't there a game going on somewhere?

8:39 pm - Wooooh. That Fiat ad is HOT!

8:36 pm - Wait. There's some coach on the sideline giving instructions on the radio to the pretty white boy. Isn't that an infringement of Rule 41? Why doesn't someone fly a protest flag?

8:29 pm - I think I'm beginning to understand this game now. Tom Brady throws the ball. Some dude in a blue shirt catches it and falls over. Repeat as necessary. Is that all there is to it?

8:16 pm - Tillerwoman says, "Is there anyone on the Patriots team other than flipping Tom Brady? Tom Brady this. Tom Brady that. Why don't they ever talk about anyone else except Tom Brady? I think I'm going to go and read my book."

8:14 pm - The half-time show was even worse than the game. Thank god it's over.

8:12 pm - Where did all those penguins come from? No, wait, they are nuns. No, some of them have beards. I'm confused. Life is a mystery.

8:03 pm - How come that old lady in the weird crown in the middle of the field can sing with a tiny radio microphone when those dudes in gray suits in the studio needed to hold those huge mikes? Is there some sexual symbolism here or what?

8:00 pm - Woo hoo! Foxboro winning at half time.

7:55 pm - "He's not a normal human being," says the commentator. "He's not a normal human being, he's a football player," says Tillerwoman.

7:52 pm - Love the e-trade kid. Speed dating LOL!

7:45 pm - Goooooo Mr Quiggly!

7:43 pm - GRONK!!!  Sorry. I don't know what came over me.

7:22 pm - How do they draw these yellow lines on the field and then rub them out so quickly? Is it chalk?

7:25 pm - Nice to see that all these kids are following my advice about wearing helmets.

7:22 pm - Tillerwoman says, "Look at all that flab running around. They're flabby. They're floppy. Put some pants on."

7:17 pm - Woo hoo! Prohibition is over!! And they celebrated by drinking Budweiser?? What is wrong with Americans?

7:12 pm - Tillerwoman says, " I think they should wear baggy trousers."

7:10 pm - So let's get this straight. Foxboro in blue shirts, East Rutherford in white shirts. Is that right?

7:05 pm - Goooooooooooooooooooal. No wait. He kicked it over the goal. No wait, he scored anyway. I don't get this game.

7:01 pm - Now my times are all wrong. I'm watching a recording.

6:43 pm - Son #2 calls on the phone. Apparently he isn't watching the SuperbOwl. He's a good kid. Better pause the SuperbOwl so I don't miss any of the "fun."

6:42 pm - Wait. Why is Elton John in the SuperbOwl?

12 comments:

bonnie said...

Something just made my neighbors scream and you're not telling me what it is!!! Waaah!

Tillerman said...

I have no idea. I think I was asleep at 9:12 pm. Did I miss the only interesting bit?

Doc Häagen-Dazs said...

Arsenal won, 7-1 on Saturday. Whats this about a Chevy? Did I miss something?

bonnie said...

The neighbors definitely thought something was interesting.

Not as interesting as what happened a bit later though.

bonnie said...

BTW, Doc Haagen-Dazs' profile picture sent me running to Google the first time I took a closer look. I think I know who I'm voting for next time I stumble across a poll for "weirdest mascots ever".

Although that thing we had for Atlanta would also be in the running.

O Docker said...

What, the SuperbOwl was today and I missed it?

You'd think they'd at least promote it a little BEFORE the actual game.

JP said...

Doc - one of the few high spots for the Gunners this season. Getting that 4th place looking harder and harder ;(

What's all this about owls? Is it related to that Madonna concert or something?

BlueVark said...

Doc: Don't you mean Blackburn lost 1-7!. It was a sterling effort to play so poorly "sob".

This is true football - abject humiliation in sub zero temperatures - and no body armour.

Tiff said...

Look, we gave you colonials a lot of perfecly good sports, like Football (see item 1), Rugby (see item 2), Cricket (see item 3) and tea chest tossing...why do you go and invent your own silly games?:

1: How come it's called football? You can count on your fingers the amount of times somebody actually kicked the ball. I'm renaming it 'catch-ball'.

2: What's with the Dynasty shoulder pads and wearing chamberpots on your head? I suspect underneath you're a similar bunch of pansies to (real) football players. When you grow up and have taken off the training wheels you can come and play a real sport like Rugby....where this weekend saw England beat Scotland (in Scotland) and Wales beat Ireland (in Ireland, which leads me to my last point...)

3: How come there's no international matches or world cup? Are you too wussy to let anybody else play in case they beat you? It's like the world series (although baseball - or 'rounders' as we know - it is derived from cricket) where you appear to have been world champions for the last 120 years...

Anonymous said...

Oh dear I note just a hint of cynical scepticism! Look T-Man if this blog escapes to a wider audience within the US of A causing some short lived unpopularity in parts of the states, can I assure you that a warm welcome will always be available to you and Mrs T in most counties of the UK. I can even offer use of a spare Laser 1 and transport to UK Masters Events.

Regards,

Brian
AKA Poesje

Tillerman said...

Tiff, those are great points. Actually I did hear some comments during last night's lollapalooza that the East Rutherford Giants are now "world champions." I guess they are if nobody else plays catchball (or handpointy as I prefer to call it.)

Things are not quite as ridiculous in rounders. Almost 30% of the rounders players come from outside the USA. And they even let one Canadian team play in their rounders league and that team did win the "world" series a couple of times.

Tillerman said...

Thanks for the offer Brian. I don't expect being forced to leave the US because of this post, but I might well be interested in doing a Masters event in the UK on one of our occasional visits to the old country.

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