Monday, March 27, 2006

First Annual Burning of the Socks Day

On Monday I saw the post about sock burning on About Sailing and on Tuesday I emailed the commodore of our sailing club to suggest that we adopt the same tradition. So, on Sunday we held our club's First Annual Burning of the Socks Day at our members' March meeting.

In line with the principle that no good suggestion should go unpunished, I was appointed to read a proclamation and propose a toast. After ringing a bell and intoning, "Oyez, Oyez Oyez!" in best English Town Crier style I read the proclamation from the commodore that

in order to celebrate the arrival of spring, he does hereby proclaim March 26th 2006 as First Annual Burning of the Socks Day.

I went on to read his decree that

from this day forth until the end of the sailing season, the official dress for all members of the sailing club while engaged in the activities of the club, will be white shirt, khaki pants or shorts, and boat shoes WITHOUT SOCKS.

Then I loudly declaimed his call for

all members to celebrate this auspicious day by attending a Burning of the Socks Ceremony at which appropriate, respectful and solemn ceremonies will be held to celebrate the arrival of spring which will require the removal and casting off of socks, and the incendiary destruction of said socks.

I then proposed a toast to the commodore, we burned our socks and we went back inside to proceed with the meeting. As the smell from the sock fire wafted into the meeting room, the first order of business was to pass a motion mandating that no synthetic fiber socks would be allowed next year -- cotton only. Thus is a new tradition established.

I wonder if the first American Independence Day was as awe-inspiring as this?


Carol Anne said...

I have always hated socks. If at all possible, I never wear them.

A few years back, the mayor of South Padre Island, Texas, established a dress code for the island. The first year, he prohibited neckties. The second year, he extended the prohibition to socks. I totally agree with him.

One minor grammatical quibble -- there is no such thing as a "first annual"; something can't be annual until it has happened a second time a year later. But if you do plan for this to become an annual event, you can call the first one the "Inaugural Burning of the Socks Day."

Tillerman said...

Thanks for the grammar feedback - it's good to get corrections from an English teacher. I must admit I've committed this error before - whenever I've started something that I hope will be an annual event.