Thursday, July 23, 2009

The Laser Sailor

The summer issue of the North American Laser Class magazine, The Laser Sailor, landed in my mailbox yesterday. I picked it up, hurried back to my favorite chair in the sun room, and quickly perused it. From back to front. Doesn't everybody read magazines that way?

Let's see what we have this quarter. Some times there's good stuff in here...

  • An article by Meka Taulbee on Cardio for Sailing. Must read this after all I've written here about how my lack of fitness is holding me back. Later.

  • A stern note to District Secretaries from our Class President about the problem of "counterfeit" sails and other equipment creeping into our class. We all know what he's talking about: the so-called "practice sails" and similar stuff that we see being used more and more at the local level.

  • Lots of reports about regattas that I didn't sail in. It's been a quiet year for me in that respect.

  • The international class newsletter is inserted in the NA magazine (as usual) and includes an excerpt from a book Be Your Own Sailing Coach. Hmmm. Might want to buy that.

  • An article by Evan Lewis on Helping you Stay Hydrated This Summer. Another must read. What can I say? I may not be the fastest Laser sailor but I bet I am the sweatiest. I need to pay attention to hydration more than most.

  • World Championship Qualification Rules. Quick check. Have they changed the way to qualify for a Masters Worlds again? Nope. Still looks like I have a good chance of securing a place for Hayling Island next year.

  • Advert for SEA hiking pants. My old pair is getting pretty ragged. Should I try a pair of those "waist lock" pants instead of the ones with those annoying shoulder straps?

  • Almost at the front of the magazine now. What's this? Looks familiar. Ohmigod. There's a whole page (apart from a quarter page ad) that is a reprint of one of my blog posts, the review of the Advanced Laser Boat Handling DVD.

Yikes. I'm famous. In the same week...

I need to go and lie down in a quiet cool place and ponder how I'm going to cope with all this sudden fame.


Joe Rouse said...

More Laser stuff, I need a drink!

Tillerman said...

Geeze Joe. It seems like my comments section has become a social networking service for Rhode Island Force 5 sailors. Don't I at least get some credit for this public service for this struggling community?

jbushkey said...

Your going big time! Your first novel is right around the corner. Her let me start you off...

He was an old man who sailed alone in a Laser in Narragansett Bay. Last year he had sailed 94 days! but now he was blagao, which is too busy blogging to be out sailing 94 days...

bonus points to anyone who figures out what I am blabbering about without using a search engine.

O Docker said...

Geez, can't you guys just get along? What real difference is there between a Laser and a Force 5 anyway?

They're both tiny little board boats that are too small to bring a bottle of wine, a corkscrew, and some glasses aboard. Haven't you noticed how Joe is always asking the bartender to pour him a drink? He needs a boat with enough room to pour his own drink.

I suspect the real difference must be that they give away a free hat if you buy a Laser. Laser sailors are just nuts about free hats. Force 5 dudes are more rugged and edgy. They don't wear hats.

Smilicus said...

A grandpa can you not be famous....

tillerman said...

Force 5 dudes don't wear hats? Don't tempt me O Docker. You really don't want me to start a series of posts showing you the kind of hats that Force 5 dudes actually do wear.

O Docker said...

How about a post on the differences between Laser and Force 5 sailors - not the differences between their gear?

One's got a zipper and the other doesn't - uh, the boats, not the sailors - but why does one dude choose a Force 5 and another a Laser? Here are some impartial observations:

LSR: Seeks comfort in conformity and following prescribed behavior
F5: Rugged individualist

LSR: Worries about the future value of his investment
F5: Lives for the moment

LSR: Memorizes all 12 volumes of class association rules
F5: Rules, what rules?

LSR: Blogs about obscure sailing-by-the-lee right of way rules, with color diagrams and citations from learned authorities
F5: Blogs about semi-naked wahines

Is the Laser sailor a pedantic perfectionist who seeks security in going with the crowd and arguing fine points of the sailing rules?

Is the Force 5 dude a hedonistic free spirit who lives life on the edge (and to hell with what everyone else thinks)?

Or are these just stereotypes and urban myths?

Carol Anne said...

jbushkey, who wouldn't recognize mock-Hemingway?

Tillerman said...

Something like that O Docker. Something like that.

mock ernest said...

The old man was fat and flabby with deep wrinkles in the back of his neck. The brown blotches of the benevolent liver spots were on his cheeks. His hands had the deep-creased scars from sticking his fingers in the hole in the daggerboard.

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