Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Rambled Muddlings

I was accused by a commenter yesterday of muddled ramblings. Oh baby, you ain't seen nothing yet. Today we will explore headstands, mistresses, butt photos, fridge doors, cephalopods, nose-picking, a torture gym, attempted rape and bondage.

Ready? OK. Hold on to your hats. Here we go.

At my first sailing club on Taplow Lake in the UK, most of the Laser fleet were in their teens or twenties. One of our favorite games was seeing how far you could climb up a Laser mast until the inevitable capsize happened. And a rite of initiation into full fleet membership was to be able to do a headstand on the foredeck of your Laser.

A few weeks ago I was reading Kayak Wisconsin and Derrick Mayoleth's accounts of various balancing feats in kayaks. I rather flippantly challenged him to do a headstand in his kayak, not even dreaming such a feat would be possible. It must be much more difficult to achieve on a kayak than a relatively broad-beamed Laser. But, whether as a result of my challenge or otherwise, Derrick has done it.

One of the members of that Laser fleet in Taplow was a teenage girl named Roberta. Full of enthusiasm and highly competitive she raced against the men every weekend and frequently beat us. Fast forward twenty years or so and that girl is now a married woman and already has a couple of Female Laser Master World Championships under her belt. It was a pleasure to meet up again with Roberta Hartley at the Masters Worlds in Cadiz in 2003.

I see that this week Roberta is racing in the UK Laser Masters at Stokes Bay. At the end of the second day she is leading the female masters (no -- we don't call them mistresses) and is second overall in the Laser Radial fleet. Way to go Roberta.

Yacht club websites usually have an attractive picture of their clubhouse or of some of their racing action. Kudos to Stokes Bay Sailing Club for daring to be different and having a picture of a Laser sailor's butt on the main page of its website.

When are we going to get to the bondage? Just be patient.

The responses to my questions as to Why Do You Hate Laser Sailors? were revealing. Many of you told me about how you think Laser sailors are the most wonderful people in the history of the planet and how all this inter-class rivalry is so juvenile. What a mature bunch you are.

But Fred, who is from Germany, at least gave me an honest answer. He said that one reason he hates Laser sailors is that Lasers look like a fridge door. So just for Fred who sails a Flying Dutchman, here is a picture of a fridge door.

And here is a picture of some Lasers.

And here is a picture of the skipper of a Flying Dutchman.

Fred also seems to be under the misapprehension that all Lasers are built in one big factory, whereas in fact they are built under license around the world in Europe, Japan, Australia and North and South America.

So again for Fred, here is a picture of an Australian.

And here is a picture of a North American.

Eugh. That's nasty. Sorry about that.
Just be glad I didn't give you a link to the video.

Did you forget about the bondage? Hey, this is a sailing blog. I think you're in the wrong place. Or maybe not.

One of my original Top Ten Sailing Blogs was Five O'Clock Somewhere. It continues to be one of my favorite sailing blogs with fascinating accounts of Carol Anne racing her Etchells, and insightful observation on sailing and family relationships. But please please do NOT go to read today's post on Five O'Clock Somewhere -- unless of course you really do want to read all about a torture gym, bondage and attempted rape.

OK thanks.

Oh. He went anyway? I guess he won't be back here anytime soon.

Was that muddled enough for you?


Litoralis said...

That photo of Brendan Caseys butt has really gotten around.

Anonymous said...

It really isn't a proper butt shot...more of a mid-body profile... so I think you need to get them a better Laser Sailor Butt photo...

The Aussie looks like he needs a shave...

Anonymous said...


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